legacy

I cannot stop thinking about my parents, especially my father. Yesterday was their 45th anniversary, a fact, my mother told me, she had completely forgotten about until she heard my voice message in the answering machine. My father had an eventful day, which in turn made my mother's day eventful as well, and not necessarily in a good way. The anger I sometimes feel towards him, which has been mostly in the last ten years - as I feel that the father I thought I had has become someone else - has changed over to sadness, as I feel that whatever father I may have, may not be around for very long.

Time passes and what we do and who we are, if we are lucky, will remain being our years. Thinking like this makes me consider every action I take, however small, and how I can be a better person - not always easy as I am extremely flawed.
Yesterday was a family day. My sister and I went to the Dallas's Arboretum and Botanical Gardens with my niece, a place to walk around beautiful gardens, step on grass barefoot, and not think about much more. For the first time event my niece had her face painted, she chose a pink butterfly, and she was so cute and well-mannered which the artist applied the paint with a sponge and brush (she closed her eyes and did not move one bit). At four years of age, if that was even popular, I'd probably kick and scream, or better, run away and hide.

The Texan Spring, which felt more like a Michigan heat wave (mid 90s, I guess), was overwhelming, so we tried to take walks in the shade to take advantage of the slight breeze in the air. The park was filled with large scale hand-blown glass sculpture, very colorful and gaudy, but it brought some color to a scenery which will sure be soon Summer, without the color of flowers, only the parched brown and light green of grasses.

[in retrospect, I noticed some tumble weed on the road in Oklahoma the whole time I drove through it, one piece was even stuck on my car's grill]

To flee the intense heat (we had a late start, got there past noon), we decided to take a 30 minute air conditioned tour of the DeGolyer house. This family built this beautiful hacienda style home for their retirement, in 66 acres of land, in the 1940s. In so many ways it reminded me of the Dodge mansion (which is much grander than this one), on the campus of Oakland University, because it started as a private residency and ended up as an endowment to the public. It is nice when people of means manage to provide to their families during their lifetime and beyond, but set up a system so that the community and country while allowed them to flourish also benefit from it. While I imagine this family, like the Dodge's, and mine, have had their share of skeletons in their closets, it is nice that something nice and beautiful has prevailed today. I hope the same happens to mine.

We ended up eating lunch in the restaurant that uses the DeGolyer's kitchen and family room, a pleasant experience, and then went to a place called The Village (I think) to have some gelato, which was divine. People watching in Texas is always prime, and that location did not disappoint (I wonder when they will begin taping The Real Housewives there). We returned to my sister's home, talked to my parents on the phone, and watched some videos of my niece. I spent some time drawing with her, making me wish I had packed my color pencils for the residency, had dinner (nothing better than a home-cooked meal cooked by someone else), played a couple rounds of Uno, then I read the longest story book for my niece (which my sister later told me I had not to finish in one sitting, only seven pages were needed - I read the whole thing, took over an hour). By the time my niece went to bed it was almost 10 pm. Watched TV for a bit and headed to bed early as well.

Today is my last day here, a short visit I hope will leave good memories. Tomorrow morning I drive to New Mexico, still not sure where I will spend the night. Any suggestions?




- posted via iPad

Location:Dallas, Texas